When we first get pregnant it feels like we are flying on all the adrenalin and the other hormones. We seem to focus on the physical aspect of raising a child more than on anything else. Will the baby have a new room, cute clothes, college fund, etc. ?
We seem to overlook the more tedious and most definitely more defining parenting needs such as the discipline of a child. Should we discipline? When to start? How to go about it? At these times we wish for a User's Manual to accompany every child born. I have good news for you; I have made a course that is as close to the manual as it gets! You can find it at sandrasacademy.thinkific.com and it is FREE for you to go over and learn the basics. I will introduce you to the course below.
We'll start with:
1. Introduction to discipline
This is where the course starts and it defines discipline as: Loving, gentle training and teaching; clear definitions between right and wrong; boundaries set up for your child's good, and yes, correction or consequences when those boundaries are crossed, good samples set forth for your children of abiding by the rules for living a happy well-adjusted life.
It goes more into what discipline is and what it isn't, explaining clearly what not to do and what to watch out for. It goes on to explain that child's primary need is to feel loved and accepted, and that asking for that love and acceptance varies from child to child.
2. Reasons why we avoid disciplining
This lesson goes deep into all the possible reasons why parents might feel it is better to avoid disciplining a child. For some it is bad experiences in their own childhood, for others it may be bad example they've seen of someone being too harsh on their child. See if you can find yourself in any one or more points listed.
3. Parenting goals and setting boundaries
Here we explore the benefits of setting boundaries, defining unacceptable behaviors, looking into setting parenting goals and values you'd like to instill in your child. Every family has their own standards and moral values they'd like to see upheld by their children, things that are important to them. For some it may be cleanliness, for others it may be friendliness, creativity, knowledge, culture, etc. There are as many options as there are families. This lesson challenges you as a family to set your own and define the rules by the standards in place.
4. Reasons to discipline
In this lesson we share an extensive, but by no means comprehensive, list of benefits in having clearly outlined guidelines for a child and how it will benefit the child immediately as well as later on as an adult. Some benefits include: helping children master their emotions, making kids feel free, learning of what excess is, and many more.
5. Parent's self-control teaches the child
Parents teach best by leading the way, the importance of our own self-control, and the qualities we should exhibit in order for children to learn by our example. It speaks louder than our words. Some of the advice you will find here is: Watch out for your self-talk, lead by example, be honest and much more.
Is there a magic formula? When is the best time? How long should we be letting them get away with things because they are too little to understand or too young to comprehend? Are we cruel to discipline a one year old? These questions will be answered in this lesson, and you will have a clear vision of where you will take your next steps with your child.
7. Practical How to's of discipline
Listed in point form are all the do's and don'ts. They include practical advice such as:
-Use 'please' and 'thank you' when talking with your child.
-Make sure you have your child's attention when you talk to him/her.
-Don't by any means use harmful or derogatory wording when talking to the child.
-etc.
8. Inconsistency vs. Consistency
In this lesson we enlist benefits of consistency and pitfalls of inconsistency. Inconsistent discipline is terribly confusing and even damaging for children. Being inconsistent with your discipline is almost as bad as no discipline at all. The discipline that a child receives shapes his behavior.
It is also important for parents to agree on the standard of discipline, it contributes to the consistency. A child who receives correction from one parent for his actions and no correction for the same action from another parent, can draw the conclusion that his actions are not bad, but that ones parent is loving and the other isn't.
There is a difference between defiance and childishness. Defiance is, as its name implies, something done with full knowledge that it's wrong and undesirable. The child knows exactly what is expected of him/her, but instead he/she chooses the exact opposite. It is refusing to accept parents' leadership.
Defiant
is not the same as irresponsible. Childish
irresponsibility ranges
from forgetting, to accidents, to short attention span, to immaturity, to mistakes etc.
If you liked this head on over to the http://sandrasacademy.thinkific.com to grab your own course on Discipline, Strategies for Stress-free Parenting. Discipline 2 is coming soon!